Friday, December 11, 2009


a lisping Lothario from Delaware
was wooing a date in his pied a terre,
her exit was quick for he cried "hella sick!"
when she asked what he thought of her derriere

Tuesday, December 8, 2009


a confused newlywed from Connecticut
was convinced his new wife was a marionette,
he pulled on her strings and some other things
'till she cried, "can't you tell I'm a doll yet?"

Sunday, December 6, 2009


a dyslexic diner from Colorado
had a longstanding fear of avocado,
so he screamed "moly holy!" when he found guacamole
on the bottommost side of his nacho

Monday, November 30, 2009


a guru from North California
was concerned that he hadn't been born yet,
'till an acolyte told him, with these words consoled him
"when you do die I won't have to mourn ya"

Thursday, November 26, 2009


A superstitious pyro from Arkansas
compulsively stoked every spark he saw
with matches and tinder he went on a bender
and ended up singeing his monkey paw

Tuesday, November 24, 2009


There once was a man from Arizony
for whom lunchmeat meant only bologna
when they handed him wurst he practically burst
and said "hey, this here sandwich is phoney!"


There once was a gal from Alaska
whose raison d'etre was to task a
dude from Duluth, who wore a false tooth
and whose job was to make wicker baskets


There once was a gent from Alabama
whose abattoir dealt chiefly in lamb, a
ewe crossed his path, he scribbled some math
and said "Martha, we're buying pajamas!"